We’ve started a series called Beginnings –Start a New Journey because we’re at the beginning of a new year where often we make New Year’s resolutions to change. But change is very difficult, in fact impossible sometimes.
If we want to start a new journey in life and change ourselves we need to do it God’s way for true change to come and stay.
In week 1, we said we need to reorder -
To put God in the right order at the beginning of every area of your life.
In the beginning God, In my life God, In my marriage God, In every area God.
In week 2, we said we need to hear God Talk because His word sustains you, brings peace, provision, it prunes, it brings purpose, and it pardons. So do you have a Word? God does speak to us through His Word.
And this week, a real twist, I’ve called it Hardwired to Haywire.
Genesis 3:11-13 (NIV)
11 And he said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?”
12 The man said, “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.”
13 Then the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?”
The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”
It took about 7 days of existence for Adam to blame Eve (in reality He blames God . . . the woman You gave to me) and then for Eve to blame the serpent, the first instance in the history of the “devil made me do it” excuse and we have worn that excuse out ever since.
The blame game, not me.
The lesson we learn from the beginning is that blame is hard wired into us! If you don’t believe that, then you don’t have children, aren’t married or you have never been accused of anything. Don’t we immediately deflect to someone else?
If you blame others for what you did or said then soon you come to the conclusion that I am a victim. Many folks in our society, and even in our churches, suffer from a victim mentality. When we buy into that mentality I am a victim we then buy into the next lie I no longer need to take responsibility for all my actions.
everyone has a right, but no one has a responsibility.
We have moved from hardwired to haywire!
So at the beginning of this year, KNOW THIS, you are hardwired for blame.
However, at the beginning of this year, cut the hardwire before we find ourselves haywire. Let’s break the blame game. How?
Cut the Wire
a. Quit blaming others or circumstances.
Quit blaming circumstances, people, hardships, sickness or anything or anyone else for your condition and move forward.
One of the most powerful things about Jesus is the truth found in Hebrews 4:15-16, “15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. 16 Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”
We have a savior that understands our circumstance and is willing to help us rise above it. We have to quit passing off blame to everyone else!
b. Change the question.
In order to quit passing the buck and playing the blame game we need to change the question. Those that are caught up in the blame game usually ask this “Who is wrong?” So the answer becomes, “It isn’t me.” Someone else is wrong. Someone else did something wrong. Someone made that decision and now I am enduring the results.
If you are going to break the blame game and cut the wires you have to ask the right question.
The right question is “What is wrong?”
That question assigns no blame and puts the responsibility back on us to fix what is wrong. If someone is wrong you are off the hook. If something is wrong you have the ability and responsibility to make a change!
c. Accept Responsibility.
Blame separates while ownership reconciles.
-We know the rules. (Again this is why reading God’s Word is so important and listening to God Talk.)
-We know the consequences. (Wages of sin is still death.)
-We have a choice.
-We need to quit playing the blame game and own our own stuff.
If you are a Christian, when you came to Christ for salvation, you fessed up, “I’ve sinned”, you took the blame, you took responsibility for your own action. And with that action and your asking for forgiveness you became a Christian. The consequence of your blame was laid on Jesus, at the cross, it stopped there.
BLAME, cut the hardwire so your life isn’t haywire.
Romans 3:23 (NIV)
23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,
Romans 6:23 (NIV)
23 For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
1 John 1:9 (NIV)
9 If we confess our sins (take the blame), he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.